Tamlin, I am sorry to hear about your loss as well. Reger's father had been sick for a while and some of us knew because the 'gang' has a connection, and some people does like you said (you have many good and true words that I could quote you on, really), they don't want to be seen as a vistim, and they restrain from telling people. Some times a empty forum, a static forum can be a good place to do what you wouldn't do in real life. Its a place to take the dumops you usally dont take. I feel for you all to the level I can. 2 years since.. My sister died of a overdose 2 years ago. I never tell people that, it seems aquard, and why should I?