Same here. I feel when i was new to psy or psy was new to me there was nothing besides the music which captivated my senses. Hardly did any drugs even , but the experience was so much more hightning, innocent to use the correct word.The more i started to get sucked a lot more negativity started to seep in ( maybe my fault , maybe the others ) Then started to go to parties sober , the experience of which i didnt enjoy so much - the music was there but there was no hightened experiences. the more you look for in the scene the more you get sucked and the more you'll have to go through. Now i feel im better off staying at home and enjoying myself unless its a 3-4 day festival somewhere in the middle of nowhere.