Drug Free Goa Trance ??????

[Guest Bob Normal]

Okay, I am trying to achive something here. Anyone believe that you can enjoy goa trance without lsd. But I did do drugs, several years ago, I stoped cause as I believed at that point I've reached the point where I took everything I could from them and it was time for me to prove my knowledge in the harshest test ever (in my existance at least) which I currently undergo with a little behind me already, as someone else beautifully described it as THE CRUCIBLE,....(mmm, yes yes....use the force you must). It was a hard time of suffering where the music would torture me hiding from me and taking stuff from me, but as I look back at it now I see that I have been tricked by an evil force and it was wrong music. Well don't worry kids I've slained them all. It's true you know how uterly crucial it is to listen to music that just makes you want to get high withiout ANY means to do so whatsoever ( this ain't no detox , babe). As I was coming down the message was more clearer than ever "Get your mind tripping, or else" alright so the mission is set, you are confused. Okay in brief, I was forced into finding ways to enjoy goa trance and trip to it, without the help from outside substances, I had no choice, the punishment awaited.

It took me a while before I progressed just a tiny bit in my research. Now here is where I need the help from such kind people as yourselves, try to follow my description of ways to do so and help me out any ways you can. I will make a new post, and if you are interseted read on below. If not... Sorry I took your time. Thanks.

[Guest it's me]

I would GREATLY appreciate replies from people who have done lsd in the past and stay off of all psychedelics now or use them on a rare occasion. Okay it started with these really wacked trips, well all of them for crying out loud, (oh last thing, what I am going to say is really important to me, I am not just bored, also I want to appologize to any people with an expanded spiritual knowledge for any terms I might use, since all the discoveries were made on my own, without any contact with like minded individuals, everything I went through and going through is an extremely difficult mind experience with harsh side effects so a little compassion is my price)

Okay so the whacked trips, First of all the message was the same, "... I live in my own reality, which is fake, the whole WORLD has evolutionized to the new level of existance, thus their vision is altered - they see lsd like hallucinations, their mind is at an extreme level of awareness, where they get pleasure off of simply realizing themselves" to put it simple I took lsd and through some warp I ended up in a world where being normal is when you trip and when you trip is when you become" no wait even more simpler (yet more embarassing for me) Everyone else is on Acid ....I am not. Well you know I am just a human, so I wanted to be "there" too. Only to find myself rudelly rejected, abused, and harmed. So the dark reality of searching for truth has begun,So the first thing I wanted to steal from THEM is their ability to experience music, cause you know how people on acid hear music,.....it's worth a lifetime. So I tried to find a sollution... I tried taking drugs all the time, only to find myself deeply dissappointed the lsd lost it's effects. Cause I remember what they said, they trip, but they don't take acid. So that's it for the paper. In a rude way THEY "explained" that their thought pattern is altered, and they use previous knowledge of LSD tripsas a strting poitn......NOT they are supirior and they never took drugs, they were simply born with the information on how to "trip". So anyways I started listening to music, goa and what not, there wasn't much commercial stuff back then, but it sure got to me. Anyway it was 3 or so years, of just the worst years of my life to get some results, to realize that noone's tripping but me, well only a little bit, and to get that "ENJOYMENT from music". So I finally settled for goa trance... okay now comes the part explaining how I do it, And again you don't have to read if you don't want to, I am sorry for such a boring experience , but all this is a bit neccessary, cause.....it's all I have in my life.

[Guest U see 1 catch one let it]

Okay so all this long stuff was just some info I decided to throw at you. The real thing is here. So all you people who are bound to help me brace yourselves for yet another long boring post. Sorry I am not smart to make it simpler and shorter, but that's the way I was born and that's my mission here. And I am greatefull for the mere fact of you even reading this, so I am not expecting like for you to understand it.

Okay there are so many things you can do WRONG if you are trying to enjoy it without drugs, most of them will get you in a weird state of mind, confusing you, into thinking that there is NO way to enjoy goa trance without lsd. The easy checkpoint is if you try to do it, and the result is dissapointing thought like,

1"No way!!! You can't enjoy it the same way when you are on acid without the actuall acid",

2 "if your brain hurts"

3"If you think you are acting stupid and embarassing yourself, by doing weird thought manipulations to enhance the experience of the music"

4"if you try to catch a tune and follow it" or "lead it in a predetermined direction"

5"you stare at things, trying to hallucinate" and you are not satisfied with the hallucinations you recieve or you pretend that you are tripping and try to see how the music would sound if you were tripping because you know it.

well these are but few examples of dissapointments in reality only serve as a checkpoint of some sort. If you have them it's good. You can even use them as guidence of some sort. If you get in a situaion where you think that "trying to hallucinate" or "walking down the musical sounds, in order to get higher" is better than what you are doing than it probably is.

Of course I was talking about myself, but it might apply for others. So anyway these were just some examples of my thoughts, the general idea was that i tried to manipulate my mind in order to hallucinate or alter the music so it sounds as if I was on acid, you know make it sound sweeter, actually enjoy it, trip to it. The results were very sad for the past few years, the facts that I wasn't able to do it were getting me so DOWN, making me wanting to live this mortal coil and forget the crual world that hosted my existance. Once and for all !! I tried so many things I tried concentrating on fifferent sounds of a track, but it would not take me anywhere, I tried just opening my mind and swallowing the whole pack, but it would not. I was just making things worse and worse....Suffer, Pain, Darkness, were all the things that I got, But I was still trying it, so came the year 2000 spring, All I had to show was weird pains in my body that would make me just fall down and be out of it for a few hours, seeing people enjoy this and other music made want to scream out loud. So I couldn't hold it any longer I want to the doctor..... and I told her what I was experiencing, you know what didn't surprise me at all ? That I found myself in a mental institution. well all I can say is they use that place for so many things, it's hard to find a crazy person there, Finally the grand final to a stupid-boy's sad story.

[Guest basi]

hmmm, well interesting... i'm in the category you describe - i've dropped more than 500 blotters but not for years... now i'm mostly sober, barely even smoking weed (this week hehe)... i think the clearest thing i could say to you is a lesson from my own personal experience - that goa trance is one of the only electronic music genres i can listen to while NOT altered and still immensely enjoy! when i began to trip less i developed the thought that i wasn't missing anything, but rather, that i was able to hear clearer... see the thing is, all those parties where i dosed and dosed... well, the whole experience was fantastic but i was never able to seperate the music from the flashing lights or the happy people... when i began to party sober i found dancing to be a great way to create the euphoria of being high while still being able to clearly hear the message. naturally that is to be different for everyone, but that's how i found it... and then, once in a while i drop another hit and my mind is like a calm pond suddenly stirred by the ripples of the drug's effects... the whole tactic keeps me mentally healthy while still enjoying this beautiful music!

 

anyhow if you want a work-out just put on some psychopod and try to follow all the sound textures with your body movements, or assign internal mental agents to track the development of each noise... either way its a physical or mental trial, or both... fun stuff, keep dreamin'

 

one long rambly post deserves another? peaze

[Guest nnn]

So they gave me this drug that made me feel so weird, but it took away all the bad stuff and i was finally enjoying music, (well weird that it was because of the drug that I was enjoying it) Actually this drug was to treat hallucinations and schytsophrenia. Anyone think that I have that...from what' I've posted. When the drug weared off I was again at where I started. But some things were different, I could experience things on music and they were valuable experiences unlike before, that I could store in my memory which I didn't seem to have before that, or it was not active. I would listen to music and my thoughts would wonder off somewhere, but I could easily come back and let me release the negative and keep the positive energy. I would actually see the music, hear the same tune in different ways, Sometimes i would get so awared of what's around me that I can read people's minds, see what's hidden from a naked eye, extract energy even from hardest and shallow goa tracks ( not to offend anyone's preferences ) that would hurt my mind in the days before, I learned to radiate positive energy, to make good things even better, all this is a goa trance experience for me. And there is a lot more. Sure there are moments when music doesn't "trip" in my mind, but there are moments when it does, and when it does it feels so good. I just listen to music now, and all this thoughts come into my mind. It certainly is that enjoyment I was looking for, but I feel it still has more to come. I guess I can't describe it now, but it is. It's still not easy beacuse as learning to enjoy music I have to fight a deasease at the same time, a deadly Hep C virus that hurts my liver. And I guess the fact that dispite that i feel pain I am able to enjoy music without drugs and get nice results, shows the true power of goa trance. It's hard to explain how it happens, I do admit I put some effort into it, and it sure is not that easy , but I know I can't deny that sometimes the music starts sounding so good, it exceeds my expectations, I can't believe I am hearing all this, I can't believe I get messages from music, i can't believe I finally had results after all this time, I can't believe that inner love for the whole world and people from deep within without any drugs, can alter the goa trance music making it so pleasurable to the ear. Sometimes I play games with music, and I can input a mind code that either gets accepted or denied by the music, if it gets accepted I get a little truth uncovered and the music sounds nice again, it's a neverending process now. Well I hope I described at least a tiny part of what's going on. Maybe I missed something but I plan on coming back to this board and hopefully get some answers from you guys. I hope you will ask me questions and I will ask you questions, so we all can learn from each other? and mostly HELP each other, eh what do you say....

I will start with first questions

There is a track by Hallucinogen it's called Astral Pancakes, I remember it was the last track on PULSE CD the very CD that I listened to while taking my first hit of acid and tripping so hard on it, that was my first "weird" trip, that was when I had my mind unfold right in fron of me and all the scary things began, but I remember now how this track broke through like the sunshine and materialized into words for me....if you heard that track or have it ....I heard these words... " ...YOU SEE ONE, CATCH ONE, LET IT GO.." (it sounds like those wavy lines that you hear after like 2 minutes, they go over the whole track, and really stand out, try singing these words to that part.....if you don't have it just ask me I can send you an mp3 track)it was like an advice on how to get a hold of that holy (for me) world and trip in everyday life, I guess it's the original code that was inputed in my mind, and started my tryings to hallucinate, I know that 's what I am supposed to do " see one catch one let it go" but HOW do I do that......????

Also the way I am progressing in my searching for ways to enjoy music is so slow, it took me like 2 years to get to the point when I went to the clynic, 2 years of NOT being able to do that, than another 2 years to get pittifull results, that are small but worth a lot, I am assuming that in the next 8 years 4 2 year periods when things change , I should have some real results, I will be 30 by than though. Is it how it works, so if I've taken acis sooner in my life, I would be done with the whole process I am going through faster ?

And does anyone else had similar experiences, maybe not so sad, but with the whole enjoying thing (or whatever you want to call it, I was just using this word for easier understanding) I guess you could call it a new way of realizing goa trance music or something. How do you get the most out of goa trance? can anyone get as much out of it, as if they were on acid? Is it even possible ?

Okay this is it, for anyone who read up to this point a deep thank you from my heart and hopes for future encounters on this board, and mutual share of knowledge. Please ask me stuff cause i sure have a ton of questions for fellow goa trance heads. If anyone will get mad at me for making such a long post I am sorry, but I have been trying to do this for quite some time, and as you can see I am not in the best of my days, I am really lost, all alone, and all I have in the future is goa trance. it took me over an hour to type all this. So thanx again for caring, and I will be adding more details if anyone wants to help me, if they ask what part they want to know more about, I will gladly put down as much info as I can, so in case anyone (I hope not) has similar problems they know where to turn.

see you soon.

peace.

love.

joy.

[Guest thanks]

Okay my first original post offficially ends here anything below this post is follow up replies. Exept the cool guy who already posted while I was typing...

well there was more. okay here is the border

____________________________________________________________

[Guest basi]

whoops, sorry for interrupting.. hell, everyone probably thinks we're schizo

[Guest basi]

er - with the same host name (to clarify)... well my question is, in the first part of the last message you seem to have found all the positivity out of goa trance - this is recent from what i understand? if this is the case why do you feel alone? this world is filled with people that fit in and people that don't.. i think a lot of goa fans are isolated outsiders, perhaps you, and definatly in my case... somethings doesn't work, its like the worlds a big puzzle but one is the piece with non-standard edges, can't quite find a place yet.. big puzzle though, so there's always hope.. so, how can you feel alone with such beautiful music? i listen and i hear a presence sometimes.. well, with those magical tracks (like hallucinogen)... one of my favourite songs recently is by bamboo forest and features this touching sample of a guy with a worried voice who says: "and i'm ah, and i'm just paralyzed, i just need a.. i just want a little guidance.. just a little something to gimme a, give me a sign.. a light at the end of the tunnel.. something, something, something to hang my hat on".. now, there is a response - but i can't ever make it out, but this is so comforting, because sometimes i have to wonder.. sometimes i am lost, but this track tells me there is an ANSWER... that simply means hope is never lost... and maybe thats what makes this music so amazing, that it can change people, give hope, promote happiness, and peace.. and well you all know the rest.. its a good life thanks to this music..

"the light, the vision"

the

[Guest basi]

whoops, dunno how i got an extra 'the' in there..

what a mess =)

 

well i think in relation to LSD.. i dont feel anyone needs a drug to relate to the sound.. it can help, it can open doors, but once you have the key (however you get it) you can never lose it for eternity.. only misplace it.

[ouroboros]

i dont know man..... but one particular thing you wrote stuck out and id like to address it.:

 

"Okay there are so many things you can do WRONG if you are trying to enjoy it without drugs, most of them will get you in a weird state of mind, confusing you, into thinking that there is NO way to enjoy goa trance without lsd. The easy checkpoint is if you try to do it, and the result is dissapointing thought like,

1"No way!!! You can't enjoy it the same way when you are on acid without the actuall acid""

 

 

first....it seems a little odd that you had to put so much effort into enjoying the music. why? if you werent enjoying it...why didnt you just listen to something else? you obviously werent supposed to be listening to goa at that partcular moment.

 

this happens to me all the time...i start listening to some goa...it aint doin it for me so i put something else on. 99% of the time thats all there is to it. i wasnt enjoying it cuz thats not really what i wanted to be listening to. i almost always start with goa...its my "default" music.

 

the more you force it...the worse it gets. listen to your body...if what youre doing isnt working...do something else.

 

and it is quite impossible to enjoy it the "same" off acid as on acid. thats not to say one is better...they are just different. how could you enjoy it the same? the circumstances are entirely changed.

 

you can never duplicate an expeirience....dont bother tying...it just leads to dissapointment. live every day in the moment. let things happen as they will.

 

somtimes i hear a track at a party that just blows me away... if i ever hear that track at another party i absolutely do not expect to be blown away again...it just doesnt work like that. let each expeiriecnce happen on its own...without expectations. you will be surprised how many things will be shown to you if your mind is open and not looking for something else.

 

im sorry if i have misunderstood what you were saying. if what i wrote makes no sense or just doesnt apply...nevermind.

[Guest unikos]

i agree with ouroboros, you cant expect to enjoy goa trance the same with and without tripping on acid.. its just different

 

my guess is that you have changed your thinking patterns from normal (common to all people) to tripped out acid thinking loops that are part of a vicious circle, meaning that they do not end up anywhere. If what im saying makes some sence then continue reading: my experience with acid tells me that when you have TRIPPED then you think that you have been shown some great truth, some revelation. But, this is not true there is no truth shown to you by using acid.. what happens is you gain a different consciousness and through this you may be able to understand many of the patterns (all sorts of them) that exist in our world.. but its just that.. my advice is please do not let acid take you over and make you believe that it will show you some great truth. This happens because you are looking for something that will liberate you. However proper liberation is a result of you trying to be a better person (from all aspects) in your normal sober life.. and not bu just take lsd and wait for enlightenment to come to you...

 

i hope all this made some sense and did not confuse you even further

 

i have a question: did u ever listen to goa before you took acid? if yes, did you like it ?

[Guest AutoMath]

I had just written a really clever and long reply to this that I managed to fumble away somehow.. grrr...

 

anyway I'll try to re-capture on what I wrote.

 

Although I've never dropped any Acid, I'm never the less very interested in altered states of mind.

 

Acid seems to render the mind open to restructuring through the means of outside stimuli affecting your thoughtforms. It seems to introduce an allegoric / associative language similar to what seems to be developed in certain occult / esoteric spiritual systems. Maybe this can be a help in the right direction?

 

You seem to be craving for a similar experience that you've had before.

I can myself relate to my early experiences of trance-culture and the amazing parties in the beginning of my experience of the trance-scene and the parties during the golden years of goa.. The zeitgeist will never be the same and a total recapture of these feelings will probably be impossible. Still I linger behind as left in a limbo, to paraphrase something someone else wrote some time ago on this board.. I've invested too much feelings, time and energy to simply let it go.. It also took me quite some time to understand some of the new music coming out, going from melodical towards abstract. But eventually I understood the groove and really liked it. I'm certain that I would not have understood or liked this music today If I heard it. It has been emotionally tied to me during earlier years, and only people who used to go to parties back then among my friends can understand and appreciate this music. I can with rational eyes see and understand how stupid this music sometimes sound to a rational ear.

 

But I've learned that nostalgia is not something good, in fact its a root of unhappiness. Live in the now, not the past or the future.. I think this could be something for you to think of too. A friend of me who have had more than adequate experience of acid told me that one of the most important things during a trip is to keep focused on the now, not longing something further on in the trip..

 

Allen ginsberg, the beatnik poet tried through the means of acid to recapture an initial pre-acid mystical experience he had while reading Francis Yates, as described in the book "Acid Dreams" by ?? This caused him much bad experiences and a lot of despair. He eventually understood his mistake of trying to direct his trip into a preconcieved experience..

 

People have tried to rationalise, categorise and find a red thread through the acidexperience for decades in a row without success. It probably just won't be done. Maybe you should try to do as THEY told you.. let it go. It might not be easy even if you know the answers.. it may be a process you have to go through. Even if you know the keys to the solution, it might be that you can't be shortcutting to your goal.

 

This is the advice to you from an uninitiated.

[Guest THE ORIGIANL POSTER]

Hi. It's me again, the person who started this post. I just want to say that I've read your great replies and very thankfull. You are all doing me a huge favor, you are not confusing me and please keep it up if you would like to. Unfortunatelly I can't answer right nw, because I have to go, but I will come back later and give some answers. Thanks again.

[Guest spacemonkey]

hmmm, long strange post, not sure if i understood all of it.

first i never took any acid, but have taken a variety of other drugs so i can somewhat relate.

 

i also noticed that you are trying very hard, probably too hard. I mean i love goa, it's an essetial part of my life, but there are times that it just doesn't "get" me. i leave it alone and return later to find it beautifull again.

 

furhtermore i have even abandoned it for a year or two, when i first discovered it i liked it but it was secundairy, then i had some diffecult times in my life, very depressed and stuff, and i left the goa for probably two years, i just didn't like it. It was too much and the feeling wasn't right.

when i returned it was even more beautifull then before and it became my primairy style of music.

 

you see, you must do what you feel like don't force yourself, listen to other music, listen to silence, it's all a part of life.

the times i love goa the most is when i have been away or haven't been able to listen to it, for a couple of days.

when i do i let my mind go and the colours come the shapes and the wonderfull feeling, sometimes it does sometimes it doesn't.

life is variety, don't force it, and don't expect one thing to be the source of your happiness because you will wear it out, it will loose the magic.

[Guest P]

When you ask questions like this there are so much that comes to my mind, so many questions you could ask. Once I was suddely asking myself why are all this people dancing hour after hour for many days to this music. Then suddly a voice in the clouds told my that they were cellebrating the normal life. Celebrating that they just are normal in a safe world in a normal world, not knowing how far out and totally scary and not understandable the world really is. So simple. Just dancing because they are not in a bad trip. Like they have bin up there, talked to the plants and everything else showing up while they where THERE... and seen how totally simple and easy life really is down at earth being in the so called "normal" conciousness thingking so called "normal" thoughts... But after a few weeks, thoughts from the other world is coming to your mind, about what is really so called "normal" in the spritual world? You can`t stop thingking. Thinking, thinking, thinking. You have seen it, bin there. There are no such think as death etc. Life is only a dream. Everything becomes a mess. You are floating in your "normal" world. Starting to look at your life from above. You can`t hide from the truth no such thing as death. You cant kill your self, cause you are just dreaming. The death is only a kind of state or other landscape or something. After a while you just want to forget. NOT thinking all the time. Thinking makes you so called "crazy" in the "normal" world which you are just dreaming. The mental institution is the place to get the things you need to forget for a while.... Forget that you are only dreaming. But you can never hide... Im sure some of you understand completly what Im talking about....

[Guest spacemonkey]

i think i do, these thoughts have all occured to me and have controled my life for nearly two years in the past and sometimes they return.

i didn't go so far that i couldn't function anymore like it happened to you, but functioning within the society that was build upon the "normal" became a daily struggle.

what i have learned from these thoughts you describe and i have had too, i don't know, but somehow i made it possible to forget them for a while, i just kept on going, now i think i have reached some sort of equilibrium, but sometimes it gets distorted once more.

when that happens i don't know, how it happens i can only geuss, but that it doesn't happens all the time anymore i know.

i know now that i have learned a great deal from that dark place and that staying in it too long isn't good.

thinking about it doesn;t change a thing. first forget about the thougths and then when you think they are gone they come back a little but because you have become more stabble you can deal with them a little but better, but still don't get swept away about it too much.

it doesn't help.

 

 

i read a lot, buddhism and stuff and it made me feel a bit more relaxed.

 

try to forget sometimes, just be a average joe sometimes and mayby you will learn to control it and come out of it stronger.

i am not sure i have succeeded, but i think i have come closer, just stop looking for the divine plan, because even if it exsists we humans couldn't understand it fully, let it flow..................

[Guest 1]

hm...

Death is indeed a real thing. life is a dream is a kind of metaphor... You and I are one. Our bodies will die. The dream changes. we are the dream and the dreamer. Our bodies live inside the dream, not dream inside the body. Spirit mind god universal mind... are all the same. The universe is infinate just like imagination and thought.

We are all thought

 

Good creates bad (can't have good without something bad to compare it with)

light creates dark

+ creates -

female creates male

male creates female

hard creates soft

on creates off

up creates down

life creates death

death creates life

everything creates nothing

nothing creates everything

yin creates yong (and there is an element of each in the other and so ad infinitum)

 

whats this mean? on creates off...well thats not such a strict rule... that allows for just about anything to be possible...

 

which happens to be the way it is! I believe what I believe is what IS, even if I don't believe it.

 

a-u-m

Trey ztm

[Guest (___/'1'___)]

Also .sympatico.ca

 

extreme yong leads to yin and visa versa

don't expect to enjoy the same stuff all the time. you may need a long break from trance to get rebalanced.

 

after you run 10 miles you'll be ready for a rest.

 

a-u-m

trey ztm

[Guest THANKS]

{{{ORIGINAL POSTER}}}}

Okay I was gonna go to sleep, cause it's late, but I feel that I have to answer all you people, because you cared for me and we are all in this together ! Okay first things first. Yes I was listening to goa trance before I took acid and I LOVED it so much...that I decided to take acid. It was defientely sounding more mysterious before I took lsd, and sometims I would look at things, usually concrete walls and I had just like a pattern of thoughts, visions,... moments of enlightment...

yes ACID doesn't make you enlightened, but I didn't take it to be enlightened, it was like a call, a need, like something out there called my name, and I had to answer.

Well I only used goa trance as an example I did try other music during that period, and I tried things like forgetting and stuff like that, see all those problems were not accociated with music, they were with mind, and I tried to use music as means of breaking through the barrier, destroying what I didn't like with my life and create something new and good, I guess the reasons it all went wrong is because I forgot about how bound we are with everything that is around us, and I guess I was reckless with my life at some points. So it took a lot of time to drive myself to extreme measures, before I realized what's going on.

Now the question, that I really wanted to answer, Why am I lonely, or feel lonely.... I just typed so much and deleted it all, because I was getting confused and all. Just like there is no straight answer. But I guess you've answered your own question. I am just a piece of puzzle thst don't fit in, and I am way off the place I am supposed to be at.

It's a really good question, and I wanna answer it but it's gonna take a lot more effort, I wanna try to avoid typing alot of stuff, so I will try to think first so I 'll just post this, and will post again in a little bit, while I concentrate, and try to catch up with my thoughts.

[Guest :(]

Well I just deleted .... I believe 2 more pages of possible responses, because they kept on winding and winding, and it was beggining to scare me, well what can I say first of all I was...well I had thoughts, and right now I was just lying and feeling the moment, and well all this things that you people said....and most of all HOPE, and well I guess it's not the end yet

And the finall answer to why do I feel or am lonely....

Well I don't know...I just can't figure it out. And I am ready for a lifetime of this, as long as i have this precious music, that will give me strength and wisdom to go on.

So I already want to thank you, for wonderfull ideas and thoughts you've shared. And I hope there will be more, and we'll talk some more, I have to go now, see you tomorrow

I hope

[Guest unikos]

i just deleted a lot of things i wrote as well.... i cant understand what your "problem" is...

you said that you can listen to music now and like it, maybe you must remember that when sober even psytrance isnt THAT trippy and sometimes it may sound boring, so it will be easier for you to get past the "i dont like music" phaze you re going through... or you could just stop listening to music, for a while at least..

 

please explain a bit further your thoughts because from what i see, you have a good sence of logical thought and this should be enough to solve your problems... Maybe it could be that you overrate your "problems" ?

i mean, life is (as you said above i think) very very simple... so just foget whatever is troubling you, dont pay any attention to it, stop thinking you are the piece of the puzzle that doesnt fit and get on with your daily activities

[Guest kriz]

peace and love people !!!

 

do what you love to do, listen to your inner voice ..

 

life will be good !!

[Guest pranaspace]

live in the present

 

admire the future

 

forgive the past

 

"""""peace and light to all """""

[Guest I know Yoda]

hmmmm, very nice, thanks for caring guys.

well I guess I forgot to mention it that that horrible phase is over, I am not like in that horrible phase anymore, I moved on to the next, but I just wanted to SHARE the whole experience with you, and maybe you can learn from my mistakes, and I asked for advices just so that I can compare them to what I was doing to get out of that problem, it looks like I did try everything you guys recomended. I was still puzzled because I am still not 100 percent happy, but the point is that I am better, if I was like 20 or 30 percent, which was like pretty bad, now I am at least 60 and on good days ( when I follow my diet for my bad liver and it doesn't hurt) I am 70 76 at least so that's progress. I was just upset that it might take me twice as long to get to hundred percent happiness, which is a normal human being or at least 90, so that I can boost over 100 on "good" days.......here is the agenda

That's why I posted this long story so that people would just say whatever they think, whatever might help, whatever they would do....you know.

But nobody answered those questions I highlighted, especially the one about a hallucinogen track, i guess noone ever heard when goa track started to "sing" on acid,....I guess that was some darn good lsd I took

(Please don't tell me about the times when you took even better acid, cause it will make me too excited I am just "showing off"

I do believe that track was the "final Judgement" for me on that tripping "trial". I t was last track on a 2 cd comp. and it was the finale of a trip......anyways, I don't wanna confuse me again...gotta keep it simple right ?

Buy guys and thanks again, I REALLY REALLY enjoy coming here and reading your posts, they are all so...... kind and uplifting.

[Guest 1]

dude..... man i'll give it to you right here straight.

there is nothing wrong with you your just fucking depressed. i've got the same thing. i was on this forum about 1 year ago talking the same way...

 

"And the finall answer to why do I feel or am lonely....

Well I don't know...I just can't figure it out."

 

gee, maybe it's because your sitting behind a computer typeing therapy... exercise, talk to friends, get some sunlight, talk to some good psychic, shaman or priest.... or DOG even. but computer can give you info but not real comfort. Plus it's slow communication.. writing is good but better if you expressed yourself with more than just your 10 fingers. you obviously do need to talk to someone. So do I. So do we all. We need love, we must have it or we won't survive.

and one must love themselves to be happy. How do you do that?

become happy. How do you be happy?

-just start thinkning of what is good... talk to someoen about what you like.

- Stay in the moment (don't think, or judge, just BE)

 

go buy a book on depression it'll help you. Also buy some philosophy books and the tao te ching.

 

you must belive in yourself.

you must get Positive vibes somewhere .... sadly though thats not somthing thats found easily.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

...Too bad we don'nt have a play where you can go and pay money and they'd counsel and comfort u and love u... paying for sex is illegal for some reason...

 

go get spiritual counsel... card reading... pshychitrist... meditate, run, eat well, masturbate... but not too much. also you want to get out of yourself

 

so go do somthing that will occupy your mind so that your not always feeling sad.

 

namaste